Yum

Tonight for dinner we had a white bean, sausage and ground turkey stew with kale, red pepper, onion, and sage. Needless to say it was amazing. Tuesday night we had Pork Chops topped with Julienne Carrots, white grapes, and a balsamic reduction, garlic mashed potatoes, broccoli, and homemade muffins with the centers carved out, filled with homemade cream and topped with strawberries. Last week we had homemade chicken parmesan which was AWESOME. For New Year's we had a turkey chili recipe that was phenomenal (and i don't even like chili!). We even had this awesome meal from Wegman's with pasta and a white sauce and peas.

I can't tell you how grateful we are for the generosity of our community.

It is humbling at best and embarrassing at worst.

If you know me, you know that I like to do it all and take care of it all and take care of everyone around me. We have been blessed by this generosity three times in the past 12 months (when I was on bedrest, when I had Maeve, and now that I have had this surgery) and I continue to be amazed at how giving and loving the people around us are. So far this time we have received 30 meals. Really?

My mom has been watching the kids two days a week, our friends have been in and out constantly, Noah's friends have taken him to Chuck E Cheese, Boomers, to their homes, anywhere they can.

How did we become so blessed?

All I can do is attribute it to God's glory and grace.

Because, you know what, this is really, really hard. I can't get a cup of coffee. I can't take my baby to her crib. I can't go to the store. I pretty much can't be alone. Paul is literally working every waking moment and balancing his job, the kids, the house, the bills, grocery shopping, you name it!

I start to feel guilty sometimes, because I am alive and well and I will get better. I don't have cancer, I will walk again soon, and so often it feels as though I am not deserving of such an outpouring.

When I'm bummed out I listen to Joyce Meyer. It cracks me up to think that I love a televangelist, but I really do. She says so many things that resonate with my life and my journey. So last night, I went to her website and listened to the sermon on frustration and I just wept with confrontation.

She said that a Christian should not be frustrated. A Christian should not ask God to remove difficult things from their lives. Instead, a Christian should seek to find the joy in every day because God put you there for a reason and if God wanted you somewhere else, God would have put you there. Frustration is the reminder that you don't trust that God has it under control. And as I posted on facebook last night, she said:

"You know what your idea of a miracle is? all of your problems disappear and there is nothing to worry about. you know what god's idea of a miracle is? none of it bothers you anymore."

So, this morning, when Noah had a 45 minute tantrum about shampoo and Maeve was screaming her brains out as a repercussion of shots yesterday, I tried my best to smile. There is absolutely no part of me that wants my family to go away, or my friends to stop checking in, or my life to change. Sure, I'd like to walk. And I will. In the meantime, I'll thoroughly enjoy my sausage and kale stew.

Maeve, 7 months

Paul came home from work today and said "Happy Birthday Maeve!!!" I have no clue what the date is or even what grass and trees look like. Alas, our little girl is over half way to her journey toward the old age of 1.

At 7 months, Maeve is 18 lbs. She is growing hair at a much quicker pace, but still remains primarily without hair. She is toothless but slimy and drooly and chomps on everything. Her gums are so strong they HURT. She is very oral in many ways. She loves the taggie blankets, Sophie the giraffe, and is pretty much content with anything she can put in her mouth.

Maeve is eating a lot of different foods these days and hasn't shown any real aversion to any of them. She is very much in love with applesauce and for Christmas she was given a lot of home made applesauce to enjoy. We just started baby puffs this week and she loves them already.

Maeve is changing her sleep patterns as well. She is able to stretch her awake time to 2 hours or so and can go much longer stretches without getting cranky. We are watching her switch to a morning, afternoon, and evening nap like Noah did, but she often needs more naps than that. Ever since she had the respiratory virus she has not gotten completely back to her night sleep, but slowly we are pushing her back. She has this habit of eating at 3 or 4 and sleeping until 10 and then waking again at 6. It isn't a great habit, but it just seems easier when we are trying to eat and get Noah to bed. We need to get her back to dinner time and then morning.

Developmentally, Maeve is sitting very well and plays with toys while sitting. She has great small motor skills and pulls everything and everyone to her mouth. She is rolling and pushing with her back legs. Sometimes I wonder what she would try if we had carpet, but she doesn't have a lot of room for traction. She can move herself around a lot and lunge toward what she wants.

Her personality is still evolving. She is much calmer and happier than her newborn days, but she is still quite finicky. She is either beaming with the widest smile ever or madder than the devil that you wiped her nose.

Every moment is so bittersweet because it could be the last time that I do any of these things! When she rolls around and stands up and eats her toes... I want to cherish every second of it.

Today

Just a couple things I want to remember.

Today in church, Noah learned the story of Jesus turning water into wine. Normally he doesn't get the gist but today he came home and told me the whole story. The teacher had them put water into kool aid and it turned into "wine" and Noah kept saying all day, "I loved the wine I had at church today!!" And I don't know if it was part of the lesson, but he kept saying, there was water and then PRESTO! there was wine!

Today Maeve seemed a lot older. She is sitting up almost all the time now and playing with everything. She is so aware of her surroundings and GRABS everything in her sight. She was so mad because yesterday she couldn't grab the logo off of my t-shirt! Today we also let her try puffed cereal for the first time. She loved it. She only had 5 pieces but when they were done she kept grabbing at my hand looking for more and screaming when there was no more. She is quite the mouthy little thing. I'm very excited about the entrance of finger foods because it just made traveling with Noah so much easier to have a little non-messy snack to give him.

It's night night time here though and Noah has a family of ducks that need my help to be tucked in!!!!