Ill-Conceived Children's Sermons

funny....

From Dr. Timothy Jenney

1. David and Goliath: Divide the kids into two groups. Distribute slingshots to the first group and have them gather 5 smooth stones each from the church parking lot. Give the second group helmets [bike helmets will work] and wooden swords. Let the sides fight and see which one God supports! If time permits, demonstrate the proper method of beheading a giant.

5. Daniel's prayer time: Find a lion. [Any large predator will do, even a really hungry alligator, if you minister in Florida.]. Shut it and the children together in a small room. Positioning yourself in a safe location, encourage the kids to pray. I guarantee all the kids' prayer levels will increase dramatically after the first one is eaten! [But hey, you can't make an omelet without breaking some eggs.]

7. Sin offerings: Demonstrate the proper method of preparing and roasting a whole burnt offering. Explain how each Israelite who sinned had to bring a lamb from his/her family flock as a penalty. To help make the lesson more memorable, have each child bring one of their pets from home. Select one or two of the kids who have been giving you the most problems and have them bring their pets forward. Now, slay them in the proper biblical pattern...

The Angel in the Sky

Well, this isn't one of my pics, but I posted it anyway. It is from a photographer who has been closely following a 7 year old boy with cancer. She photographs him all the time to get the word out about childhood cancer. When she left one of her photo shoots she swears she saw this angel in the sky....

I came across her work through my friend Amy's site. Amy has a 3 year old little girl with neuroblastoma who is in the picu right now and not in good shape. Arden desperately needs whatever prayers you have. Pray that she will be able to breath on her own again and that the viruses will stop attacking her while she is weak. Pray that she will be able to open her eyes again soon and see her mommy and daddy again. Pray that she snaps out of this as fast as she snapped into it. Arden has been in the hospital since October and they thought she would come home in July.

Please go to this blog and read about Max and his photographer. No child should have to go through this. If you ever need help putting your life in perspective. If you ever need to refocus your priorities. If you ever need a jolt to do something for someone else... come back and read this again and again.

http://mashedpotatoesforbreakfast.blogspot.com/

Favorite Foto Friday (#4)

This pic is from when we were in Rhode Island last summer visiting with our friends AJ and Brian. We went to see a bike race in Providence and we ran from stop to stop to see the cyclists go by. Brian was helping Noah to cheer. The picture just reminds me how fast life passes us by. Noah is so much bigger now and so much different and yet this was just last summer.

All Dressed Up...

and we missed the event. boo hiss. We tried our very best to do our church service at 9 and a friend's at 10:45 (we left ours after the sermon), but we showed up just 5 minutes too late to catch Cora's baptism. Bummer. But we got to see how pretty she looked!

Of course, Noah had his happy pants on and cried through the entire reception (because he couldn't eat cookies for lunch), except when he was pretending he was an elephant. He was sweet with Cora though....

Good thing he's really darn cute...

Congratulations baby Cora. May God guide your every step....